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Original French Text )

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This pamphlet was discovered and saved by Mike Maddigan, The Industrious Dullard, of Cedar Rapids, Iowa, in the United States. He was unbelievably kind enough to scan it and send the copy to me to put online. An antiquarian bookdealer, he may also have the only copy of it in print. Chivalry and History by non-Knights and non-Academicians, is far, far from dead, as he so generously proves.


The translation of the French portion of the text could not have been done without a lot of hand-holding and tolerant, patient correcting, plus invaluable guidance in the art and science of translation, by Bill Thayer. A simple Thanks, seems like a paltry repayment for such kindness, so I am adding a few million Bisous to it. — S. R.

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From Carmina Macaronica, Vindictae Adversus Julium Simonem Carmina Latina Prohibentem, Epistolium Ad Radicales, Francportus Hecatombe, by A. Tristellati; Brest :  Imprimerie Roger Père, rue Saint-Yves; 1873 ; pp. 7-19.


[1]

A. TRISTELLATI

Carmina Macaronica

_______

Vindictae

Adversus Julium Simonem

Carmina Latina Prohibentem

_______

Epistolium Ad Radicales
_______

Francportus Hecatombe

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

__________

Si sermone opus est modò tristi, sœpe jacoso

HOR., Ars Poët.

BREST

Imprimerie ROGER PÈRE, rue Saint-Yves, 32

__

1873



[2]
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[3]

Notice (Advertisement)

________

In the Introduction to Macaroneana1, Mr. Octave Delepierre, of the Society of Antiquaries of London, expresses himself in this way :  “In spite of the attacks directed against Macaroni poetry, in the name of good taste, men of high intelligence, and who occupy a lofty place in history, amuse themselves with it. They have even gone so far as to to show the greatest enthusiasm for this type of literature.” He then names Cardinal Mazarin, L. B. Alberti, Lorenzo de’ Médici, Bishop Gibson, Naudé, Genthe, Flôgel, etc., and, among the curious and wealthy collectors of macaronic poetry, Charles Nodier, Peignot, and Mr. Sylvain Van de Weyer, the Belgian Minister Plenipotentiary to London.

Mr. Delepierre distinguishes the macaronic style — first, from the hybrid language, that is to say, the mixture of words of several languages; secondly from the pedantic style, in which the Latin word is subjected to the forms of the language spoken today. “The macaronic poetry, on the other hand,” he says, “fixes the modern word to Latin phraseology and syntax.”

The French Academy, in its last dictionary, has adopted the following definition :  “Burlesque Poetry, where many modern words are introduced, to which are given a Latin ending.”

4

The rules of Latin prosody are generally adopted in macaronic poetry. Sometimes, however, they are expressed in rhymed prose, as in the following lines :

Ego macaronicum,
Hybridum, pedantiscum
Auctoris ad libitum
Credo posse melari,
Bonum latinum aussi;
Dûm fiat agrementum,
Et sal inusitatum
Foisonet rogæ bonum
Per oppelum badinum,
In modum phantasticum
Barbaturi barbari.

Naudé called the macaronic style “the funniest comic writing imaginable.” (Macaroneana, page 67.)

Henry Hallam (History of the Middle Ages), and Baron (History of French Literature), Sainte-Beuve (A Historical and Critical Description of French Poetry to the 16th Century), have remarked that the macaronic poetry favored reform, ridiculed the words of the Church, and served as an instrument of religious opposition. — If this claim were true, it would not be worth our praise; but these one-sided observations seem prejudiced to me. The truth is that the macaronic poems and its orators are met with on both sides, and that their fiery and mocking language must have escalated the controversy. Furthermore, the best models of the type are total strangers to the quarrels of religion. — Arena, J. Germain, Cec. Frey, Geddes, W. King, John Grubb, the anonymous authors 5 of Michel Morin, of the Vœux de nouvel an, of Polkamania (an Englishman),* of the Eulogy to Cheese (a German), Mr. Baron himself, in the Eulogy to a Pig, etc., treated quite different subjects with grace and with success, free from satire and mockery, and simply created amusing pieces, or literary fantasies seasoned with very innocent jesting.

Here is the list of the macaronic authors cited in the Macaroneana :

ITALIANS. — Bassano, — Tifi Odassi, — G. G. Allione, — Teofilo Folengo, — Guarini Capella, — Egidio Berzetti, — Bartholome Bolla, — Bernardino Stefonio, — Andrea Baïano, — Cesare Orsini (Stopinus), — Ant. Affarosi, — Gab. Barletta, — Part. Zanclaïo, — Giac. Ricci, — J. B. Graseri, — Meno Beguoso.

FRENCHMEN. — Ant. d’Arena, — J. Germain, — Remy Belleau, — Et. Tabourot, — J. Ed. de Monin, — J. Cècile Frey, — Mich. Menot, — Théod. de.Bèze, — Colleton Caron, — Rabelais, — Molière, — L. Bern. Roger, — Et. du Tronchet, — Plutarque drôlatique, — Anonymous Authors.2

GERMANS and DUTCHMEN. — Several Anonymous Authors.

BELGIANS. — M. Baron.

ENGLISHMEN. — W. Drummond of Hawthorden, — Th. Coryate, — George Ruggle, — Edward Benlowes, — Will. King, — Another 6 Will. King, — John Grubb, — Alexand. Geddes, — Félix Farley, — Tom Dishington.

PORTUGUESE. — Several Authors.

SPANIARDS. — Garci Sanchez.

It goes without saying that Mr. Delepierre, although well-versed in the special bibliography of Macaroni Poetry, had to omit a few. We point out to him, for example, the ones by Lelaë, a judge at Landernau at the end of the last century, and the Spinacia, Paris, Simon Dautreville, 1850. — It no longer appears that the author of the Macaroneana researched the works kept in manuscripts, which public or private libraries can conceal. A number of adolescents certainly composed some of them. I could name the rector of a little parish, an old principal of a college in Lower Brittany, who being a schoolboy, thus began a poem on the fair of . . . . . . which was held every Tuesday:

Ecce dies Martis; eniunt grands bragues in urbem,
Sabbotibus que suis faciunt tremblare pavetum. . . .



FOOTNOTES



 1  Brighton and Paris, 1852, a volume in-8o.

 2  M. Delepierre mentions, page 177, a work entitled :  A Macaronic Poem in the form of a declaration of war to all the bad paymasters [creditors?], etc. Paris, 1783, in-8o. — He declares that he has not been able to procure any information on this work, either in England, or Belgium, or in France. The aforementioned poem is by a Sir Margueré, whose name I found in the Bulletin du Bouquiniste; and it was sent to me, at my first request, from the National Library. This is not macaronic poetry at all. It is entirely in French burlesque verse, often rather dull. — I read over it and found nothing of interest there.



A pen and ink cartoon of a medallion with a jackass braying in the foreground before a gazebo, under a key with a sparkling lyre taking the place of the sun, drawn in the late 19th century
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[7]


VINDICTÆ

MUSÆ MACARONICÆ

Adversûs Jul. SIMONEM

CARMINA LATINA LYCÆORUM ALUMNUS PROHIBENTEM



AD DOCTUM ET ELEGANTEM VIRUM

Darium ROSSI

Humaniorum artium disciplinæ addictum, disertas de isto jussu ducentem querimonias1

__________

I.

Gaillardus semper cantansqne, ut pinsonus, esto.

(Herm. rom.)

Non luge, Rossi; latias non ritè Camœnas
Plaignato, quas frigidulis pulsare lycæis,
Jussu inconsulto carillonnàque tabellà2
Tentavit Simon; dadafourchans ille minister
Se attaccat frustrâ, fortunâ inflatus, Olympo;
Despuit in ventum, quod ventus semper abhorret
Et punit, ad nasum turpes reddendo bavillas.
Cœlicolæ, ut nostros aleant foveantque pueros,
Vel minimo claustri noscent penetrare meatu,
Purpureas alas saltem monstrare fenestris
8 Quas ego... sed clictus nunc vitro sufficit ictus.
Nec moror; en psallam joculans tambourine basco.
Farces quas Helicon hoc casu vidit. et ultra,
Per triste id tempus, Momo ducente, videbit.


     Simonis magni cûm littera jacta per auras
Montibus archcocax advenit, fortê talones
Gallis tornabat capricando Pegasus unglo;
Ad caudam idcircò se apposuit, — aspera fata,
Sed merita, et memet subitô perfecta malignà :
Appellans Michaël-Morinum, famulantulum Olympi,
Huic jubeo lettram sub equinâ stringere caudâ,
Ut balli-ballæ cujus sint causa riandi,
Ritu librantis, dansâ currente, crocotæ.
Ad rem patrandam, garteras præbeo bellas
E nugis Pindi in mea chûtas sacca-malicæ.
Erant tæniolæ fugientis justa Thrasonis
Carcera Pieridum, sottis inflicta paressis,
Queisque puer, crines religans, Phœbea blagârat,
Ut quondam Arcadicus Philomelam irrisit asellus3
9 Et Mornius prestò :  “Jussum persolvitur (inquit);
“Mireris jolium quod gessi, Musula, nexum!
“Est arctus, rectus, doublatus, clave marinâ,
Et gallans, habili troussatis arte rosettis!
“Hanneto! subvolita; grandmaister Simo scholarum,
“Si benè non volitas, gorjam tibi, fichtre! secabit;
“Vallibus Elysiis Simonis pande chedœuvram;
“Hanneto! subvolita; te spectant sæcula vingti! ”
Sic fatur Michaël, dorsum flattando cavalli
Assuetis manibus dauratam ferre provendam;
Istius at drôlæ sequitur pulchramen afairæ.
Nescio quid doluit, trepidat citò Pegasus ales.
Et petulans, prouh! prouh! pettarada maxima miscet
Crottibus horridulis, chartæque sub ætherea pulsæ.
Charta quid adversûs potuisset verbera caudæ?
In lapsu tournans, flicflacsona quelcuna claccat,
Et lourdè tombat, scripto lourdata balourdo,
Ut ruit ex cœlo plumbis mactata becassa.
Momus hians aderat, qui hoc factum crottibus implens,
Adjungensque amplam Lethei fluminis undam,
Salsatasque Midæ aures, grandgaminique Thrasonis,
Fasciolam duplicem, absynthum, elleborum et macarone,
Trempavit soupam radotantibus atque nigaudis
10 Condignam theæ quam Gibou et Pochet, ad unguem,
Portieræ illustres, agitarunt. Morio deinceps
Aurati cumulans vastum ventramen aheni,
Hoc tulit ad summum, generosâ mente, magistrum
Qui, jabotum gonflans, celso sibi dulcè riabat,
Impius in Superos, linguam vexando Deorum.
Ignoramus adhûc si quello soupa placebit;
Ignoramus ei si abstulit farsula risum. . .
Intereâ OMNIS-HOMO costas sibi follè tenebat,
Tirlipitante suo creptantibus ente cachinnis.



     Haud igitur, Rossi, plaintas vel soulcya mæsta
Ducere nixus eras, patriæ truculenta resorbens.
Tristes inter res, quædam sunt tantò baroquæ
Ut lacrymas nequent zygomattica tollere muscla,
Sed, titillata, I largo flectuntur hiatu.
Et desopilandam versantur pungere rattam :
Talis erat Simon, mittens Parnassidem in exil,
Atque blocans fontes Aganippidos Hippocrenes!
— At modus in rebus; paulisper sisto riandi.
Sunt immortales Gallorum mentibus Illæ
Pierides, blandæ nutrices, usquè per annos
Dilectæ, cultæ, neglectaque nulla timentes.
Hugo frontipotens, Simon, Voltarius ipse,
Antè Virgilium Flaccumque oblivia prompta
Formidare queunt. Vel prædia rustica monstrans
Vanierus, flores laudans hortosque Rapinus,
Festivos modulans Christo Santollius hymnos,
Asservant famam in studiosâ gente scholarum.
Rollinus, Coffin, rectores ambo juventæ,
Prævalidant Simon, stirpes tulando futuras.
Illos assequitur sapientûm norma magistrûm
Qui formare volunt benè natos instudiantes,
Non tantûm utilibus, positivis, terricolisque,
Sedque altis, sanctis, et menti rebus amœnis.
Verûm etenim caro junctæ sunt sorte Novenæ :
Urania astrorum, populorum Terpsicha dansas,
Calliope, Clio, Polyhymnia gesta frequentant;






A pen and ink cartoon of Pegasus flying in the sky and pooping on an poster of an edict by Jules Simon.  It is held by a joker standing on earth below.  It was drawn in the late 19th century.


11

Melpomene, Euterpe, Thalia, Erato, insimul ardent4
Væ cui quod renuit! Fourrat sibi doigta per œillos.
— Ah! pro vendendo chandellas atque cafetum,
Choucroûtam, brandy, boudinos atque bierram,
Toilas atque drapos, perrucas et solieros,
Broderies, schallos, dentellas et potapissos.
Maisones, campos, Françam vel crimine totam.
Cursibus et Bursæ sectandis aure tenaci,
Et cultu cunctis reddendo materiebus,
Pro benè soupando, gaussando, rigolinendo,
Alti non opus est Parnassi grande loquelâ;
Nix, ia, Teutonum chôs’istis sufficit, hercle!5
Fas onagris comptas de septo arcere cavallas,
Et bouticant Ausoniam comptoire Camœnam,
Sed non Grandmaistro Pindum vastare virentum,
Aut Phœbum atque chorum Genovefà trudere colli6.
Attamen, et quanquâm multo sit jussus amarus
Cordi, præsertim biviatûs fortè patronis7,
12 Rideo, sperno simul mentem spectando superbam,
Præcipitante levi normas arodre novandi,
Legès victoris tâm promptu subtereuntem
Ut latios avos cum Musis sontè negârit.
O nucium cessa, cessa quassator inique!
Hoc non durandum est; et, parvo tempore crisis,
Si scaber est panis quem mandunt infamulantes,
Se pistore fichent, ut se quoque fichat Apollo!
Dedignatur enim, post vanum castigamentum
Inflicium Phrygiæ Regi, vulgares vellere in aures.
— Pulchræ, immortales, temnunt blasphemata Musæ;
Paulò ulciscentur; vetitum autem mandere fructum,
Imprimis verdum, benè acerbum, multô crocantem,
Discipulis certè jubilamina dulcia spondet,
In quibus omnimodò plausu flatuque juvabo,
Musula faribolum pipitrix, operisque folâtri,
Omnes qui illecebras cherchabunt et batifollas.
Fautâ grivarum merlos satis esse beantur
Gloutoni juvenes, ac ipsi gutture lauti.
Artis jâmque meæ joyosi nempè magistri,
Coccaïus, Belleau, dansarum doctus Arena,
Bezuis et Bolla, et Rabelasius, et Molierus,
Drôleriis salsis charmantia floscula præbent,
Quorum adolescentes speciosa exempla faceti
Æquabunt, malgris rectoribus atque pionis,
Et bridam cunctis laxabunt fantasiabus.
Tunc per banca sciam montabunt continuelam
Simoni, quovis non unctam lubrificante,
Dentibus at totis grinçantibus, — oh! la la! mein her!
Sæpe infrena crepantem et brûlantissima strictra.
Causam cui povero, nî se pendere sub arbrum,
At saltem digitos pravis evolvere gestis
Et Dolpho-Therseï spurcatam reddere capsam.
Haud misericordes etenim plerûmque pueri :
Phallepa, dironti, mè phallépa, phallèpa kiliai!
Qui blaterat Musas, blaterabitur aptiûs ollis.



13

II.

Ite, igitur, pueri; linguis animisque favete.

(JUV).

Horresco! strident serræ; te, grande Magister,
Tornatim nostræ mordebunt atque sciabunt
Dentes in parvos morcellos millia centum,
Tâm tot mittendos ad centum mille diablos.
Sint A, B. C... dentes, primi fors ecce sciatus :

A

Ut restes, Simon, per tempora longa minister,
In paradoxa ruis, vafer, et queis nemo subindè
Ambiguas vellet paulisper promere curas.8

B

Bonus, bona, bonum,
Et prosæ paululûm,
En omne latinum
Lycæo concessum.
Sed colere Phœbum
Incommodum, stultum,
Atque prohibitum!
Malus, mala, malum!
Pauver, pauvra, pauvrum!

14

C

1.  Quid opus est versu latino cantare?
     Et quid opus prosâ latinâ pallere?
     Nonne satis gallum parlare, legere,
     Scribere, comptare, facilè rimare
               Sub tono Tra, tra la la (bis)
               Sub tone Tra deri dera.
                         Tra la la?


2.  Linguam allemandum est aptum discere,
     Valsas et valsantes benè cognoscere;
     Tunc non Septentrio vincet Meridiem;
     Meridies autem habebit requiem
               Sub tono Tra, tra la la, (bis), etc.


3.  Oportet præsertim credere Simoni,
     Non esse memores generis paterni;
     Nempè si latinum nimis loquimini,
     Habiamini, gazzamini, scorchamini...
     Hinc bellum choucroûte contrâ macaroni,
               Sub tono Tra, tra la la (bis), etc.

D

1.  Au Parnasse il est un chêne.
     Arbor antiqua mundi,
     Où nous grimpions, hors d’haleine,
     Præmia spe gagnandi,
     Mais ce beau mât de cocagne
     Non placuit Simoni;
     Il a dit :  Arbre et montagne
     Non valent macaroni (bis).


2.  Ce n’est pas qeu Simon aime
     Macaroni-ratata;
     Car c’est chère de carême
     A latio trovata.
     Ce que le Grand-maître estime
     Pingue est in lechefritâ :
     Dindon, caille, et pour la rime
     Saucissus cum choucroûtâ (bis).
15

3.  Adieu, chêne du Parnasse,
     Myrtæ dulces et lauri!
     Toute langue, toute race,
     Cultusque sciat mori!
     Le jeu n’en vaut les chandelles;
     Non lucrum dant carmina;
     Au veau d’or soyons fidèles;
     Vivat Sancta Crumena! (bis)

E

Simon! Simon semper eris;
Forsan PE-TRA9 vocaberis
A Satano, cûm videbit
Netra super quo struxerit
Ædem Revolutionis
Dicatam diablis inferis,
Quæ, jàm lezardata in muris,
Ecroulabit in tenebris.
Simon, Simon! pauper Simon;
Frustrâ rimaris cum Dæmon.

F

1.  Nuper apud Gallum,
     Ad oram Sequanæ,
     Terribile bellum
     Venerat in fine.
     Tempus pacis bonum
     Musis, Apolline...
     Viva sal latinum
     Atque macarone! Bis


2.  Atqui nunc est jussum
     Simoni potente
     Antiquum Parnassum
     Fermare juventæ;
16      Missæ sunt ad Diablum
     Correctæ Camœnæ.....
     Viva sal latinum
     Atque macarone! Bis.


3.  Si Prussi prædios
     Nostros desolare,
     Causa sit nimios
     Musæ cultus dare.
     Curramus ad Pindum lauris cuisinæ...
     Viva sal latinum
     Atque macarone! Bis.


4.  Tunc linguam Teutonum
     Oportet discere,
     Et illud jargonum
     Classico miscere;
     Mixtura sermonum
     Nobis placet benè...
     Viva sal latinum
     Atque macarone! Bis.


5.  Gradus ad Parnassum
     Erat coûtabile;
     Opus minûs grossum
     Erit plus utile.
     Librairi, — jus bonum!
     Biscabunt mâtinè...
     Viva sal latinum
     Atque macarone! Bis.


6.  Hurrah! vivat semper
     Simonis gloria!
     Hic Summus magister
     Auget ludibria.
     Bahut fit amœnum
     Julio Simone...
     Viva sal latinum
     Atque macarone! Bis.

17

G

Musas ut muscas chassantem turpiter illum
     Pœniteat culpæ promptiûs et validè!
Vindex accurrit Phœbi chorus omnis, et unâ,
     Cum virgis lauri virgilificat lul-um.
Ipsa ego de Pindo in lutum pulsata clabousso,
     Nullaque cuistrorum brossa lavabit eum.
Quotquot se tollunt de magno sidera ponto.
     Tot rorate suis, æquora, luminibus.

H

Trempa tuum panem,
O Simon beate!
In soupam alacrem
Quam portavit ad te
Momus in stichabus
Macaronicabus! Bis.



...............................................



Se tantûm cantare m’essouffle!
Vos cæt’ri, cætera! Pantouffle!

_______________

Lundigrasso, sexto Kalendas Martii, 24 feb. 1873.

Scribebat A. TRISTELLATUS.

Musæ macaronicæ ab altaribus ponticis.



FOOTNOTES



 1  The journal Guida del Popolo, printed at Bastia, contains this elegy by Mr. D. Rossi, dedicated to an illustrious French prelate. He has made a separate printing of it, in-8o.

 2  The first part of the circular by Mr. Jules Simon has been inserted without a date into the Official Journal of October 2, and the second part into the number for October 3, 1872.

 3  This line, and the recollection of the student Thrason (thraso, the fool-hardy one; a bully), who escapes from the prison of a school, mocking Apollo and the Muses, is taken from the Origin of the Cadenette, Crinalis catenulæ origo, a piece inserted into the Musæ rhetorices by P. de la Sante,** an interesting collection where some facetious subjects, treated gracefully, occupy a small place. Presumption and sloth, then and now, never lack excuses to oppose the great good sense invoked by Rollin, in his Treatise on Classical Studies, in order to show the utility of Latin poetry in elementary schools. Here are the excuses by the inventor of the Cadenette, and Mr. Simon has not given any more plausible ones:

Cur nos Pierides, cur nos crinitus Apollo
Futilibus nugis studioque morantur inani?
Desinat Aonias tua, Phœbe, superbia lauros
Ostentare, quibus vatum delira coronas
Tempora; si qua tuis, te judice, gloria lauris,
His tibi cinge caput; placeat mihi Martia laurus
Una; unam deceat generosos nectere frontes.

And here now, in a very few words, are the main grounds for favouring poetry in our schools: Latin poetry, I mean; because it would be rash to encourage in our young the careless flight of an indulgent and often deceitful Muse:

. . . . . You, holy Poetry, gave to our mind a chariot and a mistress; you bend the neck of the reluctant to reins; you add the wingèd sandal to [the feet of] the slow; you educate the rough-hewn; etc.

POLITIEN, trans. by Bill Thayer.

Jac. Wallius has written a very nice letter in Latin on this theme, addressed to one of his nephews at the start of his studies :  “Cur poëtas multi docti homines in postremis habeant; ut rem fastidiosissimam, velut inutilem aut longè infrâ se positam, poësim despiciant, non aliud occurrit certiûs, quâm quod et ipsi absolutissimâ literarum cognitione et ornamentis ingenii atque linguæ, necessariis ad poëticam prœsidiis, careant.” — M. Jules Simon will find this little letter at the end of the Anvers edition, 1699.

 4  GOETHE, in Hermann and Dorothea, swears he received inspiration from the nine sisters in turn, he consecrates the nine cantos of his delightful poem to them in the following order :  Calliope-Terpsichore, Thalia, Euterpe, Polymnia, Clio, Erato, Melpomene and Urania.

 5  M. L’Héritier (in l’Ain) made an analogous enumeration in Plutarque drôlatique about Alexandre Dumas :  “Moneta gubernante, papiero timbrato administrante, suifo, cotono, laînà, pipere, sucro, caneliâ, clysopompà, stercopodretà, arabico-racahuto et cahutchucio regnantibus, he has recognized and paid court to all these forces.”

 6  “If, among the people being borne along by modern Society, there may be some who do not have the leisure to consecrate their youth to a classical education, let them follow the bent of their interests, but do not require education, under the color of Equality, to descend to the same level for everyone.” (Disc. by M. Batbie, minister of Public Instruction, at the awarding of the prizes of the General Examination of 1873.)

 7  Biviatus for bifurcation, seems more exact to us than the expressions trivium and quadrivium, used in the Middle Ages to designate, on the one hand, the study of grammar, rhetoric, and logic; and on the other hand, that of arithemetic, geometry, astronomy and music.

 8  This tactic of creating paradox, put in place by certain men in power for some time now, in order to perpetuate themselves in it, has a fatal cleverness. — Indeed, once it is conceived, the party line is promulgated without opposition, its promoter might be the only one qualified to follow it, and so he regulates development and progress by it. Then the best minds must assume the difficulties of taking this step backwards. Thus, the full-fledged paradox endures with its sad consequences. Later, nothing less than the evidence of an impasse, or an imminent disaster, is necessary to decide to abandon it, too late, with the downfall of its inventor.

 9  PE-TRA, what thing. — NE TRA, no thing, nothing (Dictionnaire breton-français).

[18]


EPISTOLIUM

MUSÆ MACARONICÆ

AD RADICALES

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“Isti troublàrunt mutino brouillamine Françam.”

Remy Belleau. — Bellum huguenoticum.

O blaggatores mundi, falotique savantes,
Qui scitis legere, et comptare, et chirographare,
Ideis creusis ronflantes tundere phrazes,
Crebràs esmeutas avidi suadere popello,
Qui ab singis patribus proceditis, auspice Jocko,
Seu crocodil‘atris, radjahs Timoris ad instar,
Quique negate Deum, bambocchica grossa genantem,
Cuidantes Christo meliores esse magistri. . . . .,
Vos amo! Bacchus itou, Venus, idolatria cuncta;
Sed nimiûm fortes vos trouvant farcibus ipsi,
Cascadibusque bone minitantes culmen Olympi,
Ergò, pantoquetas1 braillantes estaminettis,
Otia cabboulotis, saloonis bella gerentes,
Dûm vestram bossam roulatis ventre criardo,
Vobis nunc vellem badinosos ludere versus,
Grandaque joyositas esset choreare simultim.
Nam mea par vestræ, bonamici, constat origo,
Ut modò plaisanti monstrabo carmine, fratres.
At me fata vetant his indulgere jocosis
Quin priûs accelerem vos castigare cheritos,
19 Brevi pro longis, ribaldi, grundine noxis.
Qui benè castigat benè amat” jâm dixit et alter.
O Radicales! tapajans pecus omnebibentûm,
Escoutate meas, auri prudente, querelas.


     Confiteor, fratres, ego sum quoque neptila singæ.
Grandpater hirtus Pan, grandmater Fausta-Gorilla
Hybridulam peperant cui nomen Bella-Macacca.
Corpore bella suo, câlinaque fronte mignardo,
Mnemosinæ illa fuit quondam violenté jalousa
Quam fecundârat Musis felicé novenis
Juppiter omni-parens, Atqui, cûm forté flanaret
Rex Superûm in terrá, sortes cherchando galantas,
Hunc videt, hunc epiat subitò exsilit impetuosa,
Cajolat astutè modò flirtitur ipsa per illum,
Mnemosquam simulans, et mascans gripmina tendris.
Nox erat; et gilvi sunt omnes noctilè catti!
Fraus inopina Jovem tàm prompta sub oscula troublat. . . .
Et nascor, duplicis deployans indolis æstus :
A Jove, cœlicolum mi advenit ofrma loquendi,
Ingenium vivax et aliquid numine dignum;
Maccaque drôleriis me multûm nutriit alma
Quæ faciant risu sæpissimé pouffere gentes.
Proptereá ad mentum me caressavit Apollo,
Sub sellisque chori me collogeavit in altis,
Tympanulum semper, cum masco sæpé gerentem
Pro memori matris simulo, patrisque tonitru.
Melans ambrosiæ ductam cum fromage pastam,
Cuisinis Pindi Macaronia Musula dicor;
Æolides Macareus, vicinus nomine quanquâm,
Æolides Macareus me corâm pedere nec quit.
Ridiculis hilarans, itidemque maligna malignis,
Sum gentilla bonis garçonibus, undiquequâque
Cortisata satis juvenum bouillante catervá.
Sed numquâm, testor, nunquâm nunquissimé, juro,
Neptiolam singæ vellem æquiparare sorellis
Mnemosinà divà, ut divo Patre, nobilitatis.
Me pudor enchaînat, memet non sentio dignam
Illarum, verbis collantem sauvaja cultis.
20
     Hei bené, singigeni! caudatis nonne duobus
Quadrumanis nati, genealoga vestra fatentes,
Hæc mea, justa nimis, exempla subire potestis?
Imò habile et proprium, decet, expedit atque necesse est
Gentibus humanis gentes secernere vestras.
Ampliûs offensas non vult tolerare babouinas
Omnipotens Genitor, cujus mandata facesso.
— O Radicales! paulatim corpore si vos
Changeastis, non cœlesti tamen ente fruentes,
Constaner bassos monstratis pectore diro
Fulvorum instinctus, queis, panditur ortus ab imo.
Fratres inter vos, hominum autem nomen et ædes
Usurpavistis, cœlo terræque molesti.
Nil magnum gestis, nil dignum, nobile vestris;
Non amor in Psychen, tantûm furor ardet in artus;
Vos Furiæ ducunt, non veró justa Minerva
Per cædes, astus, annexatam urbibus URBEM.
Ignoscat ve PIUS, veniam det sive Redemptor
Mitis; at Superi quos ridiculastis Olympi
Diffitentur vos, ullis sine laudibus ausos.
— Vadite, singigeni; lætas cherchate forestas
Quæ pariter vobis glandes fontesque minstrent;
Vignificate locos; sine vitibus esse nequetis;
(Sed non gaillardos, brutas facit archibibatus).
Frangite connubium; crebrò mutate femellis,
Cuomo de vestiment, vultis putà ferre chemisas;
Natos et natas communi parte creatos,
Vos embètantes escam potumque petendo,
Grouillantes poveris dimittite matribus illâc;
Putres ad libitum lutis infoutite mortos,
Sine crux, sine lux, sine aqua benedictus,
Et quod pejor est, importunos sine sacersos
2. . . .
21 Nec troublate novis facinorgibus ardua rerum
Tempra; nec tetro solemnia rumpite flutu;
Pestila nec faiblis animabus ferte venena;
Nec brûlate domos, archîvas et monumenta;
Nec tentate, pigri, fructum violare laboris,
Vos sociale novà jactantes pandere crustà3. . . .
Nec... nec...; funebre hoc nollem deroulare chapitrum
Cui non dissimiles estis donare parati.
Concludo; fidis, bonamici, credite verbis :
O Radicales! Non mesmas ducite vitas.
Damnosâque viâ retrò divertite passus;
Aut rapidè scalam degringollabitis altam
Quá ad species hominum lenté ascendisse putatis
Spontibus attomulis, nullo generante Deorum.
Ex intellectu tantùm gardare maliçam
Fas erit, è falso brouillamina fœda savoiro.
Verbo iterûm à cœlo privati, — pœna blagâtûs
Et jacti prælo poisoni quotidiano, —
Chimpanzæ, Satyri, Bacchi turpîssima turba
Mox eritis, Dixi; supremum audita monitum :
Singigeni aut homines, tandem resipiscite! Bonsoir!

________


Mardigrasso, quinto kalendas Martii, 25 Febr. 1873.

Scribebat A. TRISTELLATUS.

Musæ macaronicæ ab altaribus ponticis.



FOOTNOTES



 1  Pantouqueta (Provençal), a drinking song.

 2  These two lines, strangers to both prosody and grammar, are the text of a funeral oration, a very funny one, in the verse of Lower Brittany, in honor of a bluejay by the rector of Saint-Jean-du-Doigt. — Meulidiguez quguin gaër cure Sant-Yan-ar-Bis. Morlaix, chez Ledan, vers 1803.**

 3  Nova Crusta socialis, the New Social Class — of Upstarts or Wannabes.





[22]

FRANCPORTUS HECATOMBE

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Nullos espargnat enrabiata lues.

ARENA. — Bell. gen.

Vah! stupeant gentes! poili plumæque phalanges
Vulpes et cervus, lepus, aper, phasia, perdix,
Per campos, silvas, — Spatiosa per æthera cœli,
Autumno insultant, sanctum joculantur Hubertum.
Incagantve bonæ tristantia templa Dianæ.
In vacuo restat permissio chassis inanis
Carnere; fichuta et mea currunt franca viginti.





     Est propé Compeignam Francportûs hospita villa
Quà fueram, pauper, pro opulentà chasse vocatus.
Possessor villæ, meûtarum fortis amator,
In canibus centum vigilantes ducere curas
Suetus erat; laté hoc celebrabat fama dog-huttum.
Heu! quid aïam? lacrymis citó suffocarer amaris
Si sortem subitam vellem narrare disertim!
Pauca loqaur :  Nemorum Nymphæ, diffundite fletus!
Flete, piæ, mecum; nil tám crudele Dianæ.
Vixerunt centum lecti pro stirpe molossi
Racibus in multis quas dixit laude Fracastor.
Vixerunt centum! Nymphaæ, diffundite fletus!
Horrisona hæc centum reticebunt guttura posthàs
Quorum waobao tremblabant cervus et aper,
Prædo lupus, caulumque vorator Jano-lapinus. . .
Flete, piæ, mecum; Nymphæ, diflundite fletus!

23

     In comitem turbam nonnullos Marquisus angios
Intermiscuerat, validá de gente, recenter,
Qui tamen occulti rabiei gessere veneni
Germina, et immani socios fædàre momorsu.
Mox agitatores dignoscunt signa pericli,
Sunt et in ambiguo quis sit rabiosus; an ille,
Aut alter? plures possent servare vel unum?
Tunc castellanus, plenus mæroribus, hæret. . .
Paulisper verô; bêtarum nempé medentem
Consulit :  Hei! damnant Epidauri oracula cunctos! . .
Vultum herus obnubens, compescit palpita cordis,
Strychnina et rapidas mortes poisonna ministrant.
Vixerunt centum! . . Mea quid sunt franca viginti
Strages anté illas, et tantos anté dolores,
Impensas itidem nummorum mille viginti
Temporis et pœnæ renovandi tale canagmen?
Ah! mecum Nymphæ, nobiscum fundite fletus!
Vixit, eheu! vixit delectæ turba Dianæ!
— Et tu non illos, Circes forté æmula, Strychnin,
Fac mutando homines; habemus satis enrabiates.

A. T.




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Elf.Ed. Notes

 *  Although not Macaronica and not by an anonymous and forgotten Englishman, the Polka Craze in the 19th century inspired this wonderfully funny cartoon by Charles Vernier, also a Frenchman:



POLKAMANIA.





La Polkamanie (Polkamania).  A lithograph by Charles Vernier of a tall, frowning French policeman, standing behind and looking upon a dancing couple.  The hatted and bearded man dancing is holding his partner close.  His leg is kicking out to the side, the woman’s striped dress billows out in the vigorous movements of the dance.


Lithograph by Charles Vernier, 1844.   
Courtesy of the New York Public Library.

THE POLKA AT A PUBLIC DANCE.




“Young man! I say, young man! Your dancing is so disorderly that it is incompatible with the constitutional authorities of your homeland!”

    “Officer! You wound me! You can see that we are just Polka-ing!”





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 **  For whatever it may be worth today, the poem Origin of the Cadenette, Crinalis catenulæ origo, by Jacques-François-Xavier de la Borde, a senior in Rhetoric, can be found on page 29, in the Musæ rhetorices by P. de la Sante. Asking for his opinion of it, since I don't speak Latin, Bill Thayer did not think much of the poem, and he speaks Latin and French. And as for the rest of the book, he says, “But why on earth would I, would anyone, be interested in a 16c high-school poetry yearbook? Not everything in Latin is worth reading!!”

A cadenette is a queue of hair, a style worn by men for several centuries. It could appear as a very long pigtail, or braid, worn behind the head. The man who started the style was a Marshal of France, called Honoré d’Albert, Lord of Cadenet (1581-1649). In the 18th century the style was resurrected by military men and worn by them for centuries. The French infantry was the first to adopt it. The term later seems to have included different styles of braids and lovelocks worn by both men and women in other walks of life. The simple cadenette was expanded and embellished over time, of course. It could be interwoven with ribbons, powdered and added to wigs, worn loose or pinned up, etc.

Here is an example of a soldier’s cadenette worn on the back of the head during the Napoleonic Era, in this picture by Bosio, taken from a very beautiful website on the History of French Culture and Fashion: La Mesure de l’Excellence, created by Richard Le Menne:



<I>Les Oublies</I>, by François-Joseph Bosio.  A drawing of a French soldier with a long skinny cadenette (braid) trailing down his back to his waist, beneath his wide black hat. He is smiling and looking at three women and a child at a fountain. Picture from the site <I>La Mesure de l'Excellence, and probably from a period magazine of the time.

Les Oublies, by Baron François-Joseph Bosio (1768 -1845).
Courtesy of La Mesure de l’Excellence.




Another older example of a cadenette, this time as a braid just behind the ear, was worn by Christian IV, the king of Denmark and Norway, from 1588 to 1648. It can be seen in this portrait of him, in oil, by Karel van Mander:



An oil painting of Christian IV of Denmark and Norway, in profile, by Karel van Mander.  He is wearing a black hat with a white plume.  There is a long thin cadenette, or braid, from just behind his ear, trailing over the front of his shoulder.

Christian IV, by Karel van Mander.



“Whatever happened to cadenettes?” you may ask. They are alive and well in the 21st century in a new guise, with a new name: hair extensions. But the old French name is much catchier!



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 ***  The pastor’s name was Bail, or Baill and he lived in the 18th century. The reference to him, and to his funny poem to a bluejay is in Répertoire général de bio-bibliographie bretonne, Volume II, by René Kerviler, Rennes: Librairie Générale de J. Plihon et L. Hervé, 1888, p. 47, Number 84. There the entry for “Bail, or Baill”, states:

“A pastor of St-Jean-du-Doigt, named Baill, in the 18th century, said Kerdanet (Notices chronol., p. 445), copied by Cayot-Delandre (Biog. bret.), who composed some Breton poems among which is the playful poem to the Bluejay: Meulidiguez Keguin (on a loose sheet): but the dates of the biography are not known.”





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Original French Text )

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