THE GARDEN
                        
                         OF

                MAECENAS


              
               PLUCK THE FRUITS!


     Don't just donate, get something

                             cool!



    ELFINSPELL IS NON-PROFIT BUT NOT A .ORG.  
    (TOO MUCH PAPERWORK AND BUREAUCRATIC
    MALARKEY).


    SHOULD YOU WISH TO HELP SUSTAIN IT, YOU MAY
    AND WE THANK YOU.  WE BELIEVE THAT YOU SHOULD
    BENEFIT FROM YOUR KINDNESS.   AS WE GO, THERE WILL
    BE MANY SOUVENIRS FOR DONATIONS TO SUPPORT THE  
    PEOPLE WHOSE WORK WE BELIEVE IN.

    CHECK OUT THEIR WORK BELOW.  NOT ONLY WILL YOU
    FEEL GOOD, THINK WHAT THESE FOLKS COULD DO IF
    THEY HAD MONEY ALONG WITH THEIR GENIUS!  PLUS,
    YOU GET A PRESENT, AND AN ONLINE
    ACKNOWLEDGEMENT, IF YOU WISH, AND A THANK YOU!!!  
    NOTE.


           THE REWARD FOR HELPING?

    At last! It's here and ready. The first
    edition of the honest person's
    revenge (click on the link):


              My Liary  



    You know just who deserves this
    present. A gentle, funny gift that
    confronts a problem behavior, with a smile.

    And that's not all!

    THE PERFECT  SYMBOLIC GIFT FOR ANY APPLICABLE
    OCCASION.

    You, obviously are warm-hearted.  
    Don't you wish a few people you know were too?
    As a prod to those who need reminding that everything is
    not all about them alone, we have the ideal suggestion,  
    from you via St. Valentine, or St. Nicholas, or The Birthday
    Fairy, or whoever else.

    YOU WILL -- FOR A (Minimum) TEN DOLLAR
    DONATION (PLUS POSTAGE)-- BE ONE OF THE
    LUCKY ONES, WHO HAS THE PERFECT PRESENT
    TO GIVE TO THOSE  WHO NEED A GENTLE HINT!

    For those with that ol' Coal, Coal Heart that's makin' you  
    blue (e.g. the dear ones with rocks in their heads).  Or just
    for fun.  

    An Honest-to-Pete, fresh-picked, all natural LUMP
    of COAL. The Rock of Ages no less.   Not your machine
    marred piece of charcoal, but the real thing, fresh from the
    mountains of Appalachia.   A Raw Rock, bare naked.  A Pre-
    BBQ Briquette au natural.  A proto-diamond, even.  

    Makes a great, but messy  paperweight.   We'll pick it for you
    ourselves.   

    Our choice of ribbon and mylar wrap, though,
    (there are only 2 stores in these here hills -- coal is easier to
    come by).

    It's light, and postage will be minor, depending on
    your time frame.  Contact us and we will get all the
    details from you:  like the recipient of the coal and
    the recipient you choose of your donation.   

    They will get all the money, too.   

    TAKE A GANDER AND SEE.

    THEN TO GET ONE LUMP OR TWO (OR TWENTY EVEN),
    after all, if one is good, why not a carbon copy?
         
                                   
CONTACT US.
LUMP OF COAL

    Alright!  So you want more choices.  How about an
    original T-shirt slogan?   Now we have them, too.

    These are good quality cotton T's, with heat-set transfers
    done by Anita at Fielder's Choice in Pound, Virginia.  The
    ideas are ours, the excellent work is hers.

    All come in M, L or XL at present.  Special orders for
    other sizes are possible, naturally.  Contact us for
    ordering.

    For a picture of each shirt, click on the slogan or the
    thumbnail.  The print color is the same for each type, the
    colors available for that shirt are shown in the teeny
    striped box.  The graphics are done by Gary Jessey from
    Dunham, Kentucky.

    (Remember, colors on the web are only approximate)

    (Suggested minimum donation, 20 bucks, 50% goes to
    the recipient of your choice.)


FIRST SERIES

 1.  Viagra won't help a limp brain!

2.  Dumb & Sweet
beats
Smart & Mean
Dumb & Sweet beats Smart 7 Mean T-Shirt
Dumb & Sweet beats Smart 7 Mean T-Shirt
Dumb & Sweet beats Smart 7 Mean T-Shirt
Are you sure your thumbs oppose?  T-shirt


4.  All I want for Christmas is a frontal lobotomy!
t-shirt: All I want for Christmas is a frontal lobotomy!



6.  Get pretty for peace!
T-shirt: Get pretty for Peace!
Give me one good reason why I shouldn't go NUTS!


    AFTER YOU TAKE YOUR LUMPS, OR SNAG A SHIRT,
    [or both!] PICK WHO YOU WANT TO SUPPORT FROM
    BELOW:



                   TRAILBLAZERS AND
                                         MAVERICKS:




    THE CHORDOMA FOUNDATION:

    A CRITICALLY IMPORTANT GROUP, STARTED BY
    AN AMAZING GUY, JOSH SOMMER, AND HIS
    MOTHER SIMONE SOMMER, MD.  THESE TWO
    DROPPED EVERYTHING TO SUPPORT RESEARCH
    TO TREAT A RARE SPINAL CORD TUMOR, WHICH
    JOSH HAS JUST DISCOVERED HE HAD.  THEY'RE
    ARE ALSO ACTIVELY ENGAGED IN THE
    RESEARCH -- FOR ALL VICTIMS OF THIS
    DREADFUL CANCER.



    downwinders.org:

    Jay and Monty are desperately working to raise
    awareness and assist those who were victimized from
    the radiation exposure they suffered when the United
    States tested nuclear weapons in the 50's and 60's.  
    The fallout spread much farther than the government is
    willing to recognize.  How many more cancer victims
    will die?







    LacusCurtius:

    THE BIGGEST ROMAN GATEWAY ON THE WEB
    WITH A FIERCE BELIEF THAT OLD TEXTS SHOULD
    BE AVAILABLE TO ALL.  

    BILL THAYER IS A GOOD GUY.  GOOD GUYS
    SHOULD BE REWARDED.  GENEROUS THROUGH
    AND THROUGH IN HIS LABOURS AND HIS HELP,
    MUCH OF ELFINSPELL LOOKS A WHOLE LOT
    BETTER, THANKS TO HIM.  (HE FOUND THE FIRST
    LUMP AND TOOK ITS PICTURE TOO, AND GAVE
    PERMISSION FOR ME TO
    USE IT).



    EVERYONEWHOSANYONE.COM:

    GERARD JONES HAS THE BRAVEST AUTHOR'S
    WEBSITE ON EARTH.  AND HE IS AS SWEET AS HE
    IS BRAVE.  HE WROTE GINNY GOOD, A
    WONDERFUL MOSTLY AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL
    STORY SET IN CALIFORNIA DURING THE DAYS OF
    THE FLOWER CHILDREN. MAY HE WRITE LONG
    AND PROSPER!



    THE ONLINE SUDA:

    AN ADVENTURE IN PROCESS.  DAVID
    WHITEHEAD,  FROM ACROSS THE POND,
    LEADS A GROUP OF IMPASSIONED CLASSICISTS
    WHO ARE TRANSLATING ON LINE -- IN BITS AND
    PIECES -- THE SUIDAS, A BYZANTINE GREEK
    LEXICON FROM THE DARK AGES. IF THEY MADE
    A DOLLAR OR TWO, THEY COULD GO FASTER.  
    HE'LL KNOW THE BEST USE OF YOUR MONEY TO
    GET THE JOB DONE.



    TERTULLIAN.ORG:

    ROGER PEARSE,  ALSO BEYOND THE SEA, IS
    THE GENIUS BEHIND THIS, WHO RUNS AROUND
    EUROPE PHOTOGRAPHING OLD MANUSCRIPTS
    AND TEXTS,  PUTTING THEM ONLINE FOR US ALL
    TO READ AND IS FREE WITH ADVICE AND
    COMPLIMENTS.



    MEDIEVALGENEALOGY.ORG.
    UK:  

    CHRIS PHILLIPS, A BRIT, TOO, HAS A GRAND
    WEBSITE FOR EVERYONE INTERESTED IN THE
    MIDDLE AGES OR HOPING TO FIND A KNIGHT IN
    SHINING ARMOR, OR DAMSEL IN OR OUT OF
    DISTRESS, IN THEIR FAMILY TREE.



    LIVIUS.ORG

    ANDREW SMITH, WHO AUTHORS A
    WONDERFUL WEBSITE IN BETWEEN HIKING
    WALES.  HE HAS MY FAVORITE GREEK
    SCULPTURE OF THE DYING GAUL ON THE HOME
    PAGE.







         LIBRARIES WE HONOR:

    THE AMES FREE LIBRARY OF EASTON,
    MASSACHUSETTS -- THEY FREELY SHARE THEIR
    KNOWLEDGE AND TALENTS.


    THE SMITH COLLEGE LIBRARY AND ARCHIVES --
    THE FIRST COLLEGE I FOUND THAT ALLOWS NON-
    STUDENTS AND FACULTIES TO CHECK OUT
    BOOKS THAT ARE UNAVAILABLE ANYWHERE
    ELSE.  PLUS, ANYONE CAN USE THE ARCHIVES.


    JENKINS PUBLIC LIBRARY, FOR BEING NICE TO
    EVERYBODY, AND HELPFUL, ESPECIALLY TO BILL
    THAYER ON HIS VISIT (so he'll come visit us again).



    ELFINSPELL:

    OF COURSE THIS IS AN OPTION.   MYLAR
    AND RIBBON AREN'T FREE.   THE MORE
    DONATIONS WE RECEIVE, THE MORE WE
    CAN SUBSIDIZE  THESE ARTISTS AND ARTI-
    SANS UNTIL THEY TAKE ROOT AND ARE UP
    AND THRIVING AND THE MORE WE CAN
    PASS ALONG TO OTHERS WE HOPE TO
    SUPPORT.


    DONATIONS OF ANY AMOUNT ARE WELCOME.
    CONTACT US.

7.  Give me one good reason      
why I shouldn't go NUTS!
T-Shirt: Viagra won't help a limp brain!
Dumb & Sweet beats Smart 7 Mean T-Shirt
T-Shirt: Where am I on the brain transplant list . . . and could you put a rush on it?
Dumb & Sweet beats Smart 7 Mean T-Shirt

home


Court of
the
Muses


contact


gazump

home


Court of
the
Muses


contact


gazump
gazump.  British slang : To take back a promise to sell,
           in order to offer something more interesting.